'm the type of guy who will never settle down

I'm realizing that I'm writing my blogs at the wrong time of day. I seem to have the most profound thinking spells when I'm attempting to fall asleep, and your mind just won't shut up. And now, after having slept a little bit, I can;t remember any of the great philosophising I did. The problem is if I started writing right then, I'd never get to sleep. Woe is me.

I'm still having the feelings of needed to run away. I don't really know why, but maybe its just time to go again. Oh, now I remember what i was thinking about earlier... the memory part fo the brain still works! I was thinking back to being in Sydney. Many of you know i took 2 trips down. The first one was a blast, the second one was a recovery. I left Atlanta in an almost depressed, heartbroken state. It was so bad, up until I got on the plane I was thinking about cancelling. It didn't help when I got there my hostel reservations had been lost.. and had no place to stay. Luckily the nice people there found a spot for me to sleep. What do i get for staying in a place called The Funkhouse (and it was not the nicest place, but oh well)

But the main memory fo the trip is alot of good advice i got from random people. The best was from this girl who i met on New Years Eve, I don't remember her name, but all she said was "Just be yourself James, and people will love you". For some reason, when she said it, it just stuck in my head for the next 3 weeks, and the next few years. And after the rocky start, I had a fabulous time. Saw some stuff that was amazing and beautiful. Met some women who were likewise. It rocked. And really, i had no itenerary for the entire trip after getting to Sydney, but i made it work and had a blast, even with numerous hickups along the way.

So, even through the depression and the heart ache and the general misery of the months prior, one phrase, "just be yourself James" solved it all. How great is that. And occasionally I lose sight of that little idea, and I find myself bending to please others. I kind of benn feeling that way of late. I'm changing that.

It sucks when we lose sight of so much due to the world around us and the pressures it exerts. You just need a moment to refocus on whats really important. I'm in definite need of an adventure... now I just need to do it... thats always the hard part.

On a side not, I think i should give Grace and Tanya some credit. I used the word Kerfuffle today. As in.. "The hydraulic system on 274 is all kerfuffled".