Thursday, January 25, 2007

hrough it all, when there was doubt, I ate it up & spit it out. I faced it all & I stood tall!

What's left to say? I really don't know. Things seem to be in a whirlwind around here, and I kinda dig it. People are coming and going and every night this week I'm out and about being social and all. I'm bit so sure how that happened. I'm also not so sure how I'm affording it. It will all come to a crashing halt in due time I'm sure.

Well, everyone will be happy to know I'm not insane. Well, at least according to the personality assessment I took. Or maybe I am and that's what they are looking for in an employee. But the upside is I passed my tests at Delta and I get to be interviewed. Which I can only imagine will be 5 or six people with an inquisition like atmosphere. Then again, I may be wrong. I'm looking forward to it and also dreading it.

While I appreciate everyone being so encouraging and thoughtful with their praises for me, I'm a little weary. What happens if I blow the interview? it happens, I've done it before. And it's bad enough if I don't live up to my own expectations, but disappointing others is more heartbreaking.

But, I'm also very flattered my everyones opinions of my skills and qualities. I have good friends, and that makes me happy.All that's left to do really is on February 1st, put on the "superman" suit and go impress the hell out of them.

And then more decisions to be made. I've determined that the income tax refund will go for paying off some debt. I've already went to a zero balance on one card and cut another one up. I'm going forward with the roommate, and that will help save me some dollars, which can pay off another balance. I'm all for living cheap. And, as a friend pointed out, one of my biggest expenses from the past year has been removed from the equation. Just another positive result of an personal cleansing of bad things from my life... I'll keep telling myself that.

I have realized I was happier when I made less money then I am now, and I don't undertsand that, it's against everything that the materialistic society we live in proclaims. It re-inforces that money isn't the end all for living a good life. It's good to not worry about your bills, but it also can provide a false sense of satisfaction... and then your working more for that "satisfaction"... until u realize you've now worked your ife away to have the nicest shoes or the most expensive car. Hears a hint, a Honda will get you there just as well as a Mercedes... and probably with less maintenance. If you are being judged by the car you drive, then you ar eprobably hanging around the wrong kind of people.

Well, it's time to go back to laundry, which is very exciting to me! OK, not really, but it is nice to have clean and good smelling clothes. Hope all is well, and maybe in a few weeks I'll have some good news. And I'm still waiting for the bids for buddy passes to come in...

Tuesday, January 23, 2007

hrough all the twists and bends, wil you fulfill your dreams? Not as easy as it seems

I've been oddly quiet lately. Mainly I have nothing exciting to report. I'm pretty much in a holding pattern for a few things and just waiting for my EFC time to come.

I've managed to get my income tax returns filed, and there's money on the way back. That's good. I just need to stay focused on paying off debt and not go out and blowing it on a trip to.... whatever exotic land I read about today. Which happens to be an article on Kabul in the NY Times... apparently Afghanistan tourism is making a comeback. I think I'll wait before taking that trip. But hopefully by the end of the month I'll have money in the bank. I love electronic filing and direct deposit.

Now I'm just sitting by the phone waiting on people to call and offer me jobs. That's nerve racking enough. And I hate companies that after an interview don't let you know that you didn't get the job. And there's always the fun of rejection... I got that one down of late. But otherwise, I'm just waiting to see if my personality assessment painted me to be a psychopath.

Since the myspace folks have decided to allow us to have a ridiculous amount of pictures, I though I would add some. Most are old, but bring back a lot of good memories. It's also neat to see how some things have changed, and how some things have stayed the same. I also started msis hanging out with some old friends, and hopefully I can recitfy that this year. It's hard for us to get together with the adult lives we have bult for ourselves. Damn society for making us grow up!!

Oh, and artists out there, quit deleting my songs!!! It's kind of annoying.

Thats about all for tonight, hopefully soon I'll have some good enws to spread out to everyone. eveyrone out there keep your fingers crossed. Or at least something profound to write about. Check out the new picture, I love comments. Makes me feel loved!!!

Thursday, January 18, 2007

One step and tomorrow comes, Two steps and she's off with someone

Current mood: complacent
It would be easy to write something kinda blah and complaining about my status in world. In my mind, there's lots not going exatly how I wanted, be it job or relationships or cash flow issues. But really, it helps to remind myself that my issues, eventhough they seem insurmountable and overwhelming to me at times, are really not so serious. So instead, I'll be thankful that things aren't that bad for me, compared to some people I care about. So without getting into specifics, as it is not my place, let's try and be happy for what we have... though it can be difficult at times. And hopefully, even with the insurmountableness (I made that word up) that I'm perceiving, a little diligence and resolve will get me through.

That being said, the tests today were not so bad, though I deplore standardized testing and personality assesments. I feel they are not accurate in describing ones abilites, and the personality assessments are just to see if the person is smart enough to steer the results to the traits they prefer. I usually do well, and I think I'll get a satisfactory score and move to the next step. I put my suit in cleaners in preparation... and the zipper still works.

I also am missing tennis. Both because it means the weather is decent and not the crud we have today, and because I really want to hit something. But alas the weather and scheduling has conspired to keep me off the courts. And I'll be dreadful when go back out I'm sure. But the stress relief is wonderful, and its cheaper than hookers.

So, that's about it for this week. Heres to keeping our thoughts positive and holding on to hope for tomorrow.

Tuesday, January 16, 2007

I let the melody shine, let it cleanse my mind, I feel free now

I remember now one of the reasons I disliked college. Studying. Over the last week or so I've been pounding the manuals and FAR's and what not to remember those obscure things I once learned but have forgotten. And really and truly, its comforintg that I am able to recall most of the information. There is some minutia that just doesn't get used much that I've lost. And there is the theory behind some things that I don't use, just the practical application. Like why the jet stream form... I just know its there, avoid flying directly into it and it will make things bumpy.

On the other hand, I'm probably more dispatch savvy now than anytime since I actually took my exam with the FAA. That's good, as I often get challengd by the fly boys who think they know everything. They don't.

Speaking of that, ran into some fine examples of aviators last night, and one specifically was just crying out to be made fun of. So we did. And once introduced, the name sounded so familiar, and today I remembered why. This individual had braking issues and departed the runway. Thats pilot speak for he landed to fast and too late and didn't stop before he ran out of concrete. Luckily no one was hurt. Just some nerves frazzled.

I wouldn't be so adament about making fun of him if he owned up to the mistake, but claims still it was an issue with the airplane. A mechanical fault yet unduplicated and undiscovered after being thoroughly examined by our maintenace staff and Boeing.

Maybe that's why he feels the need to wear his sunglasses backwards... in a bar... at night. Then he went on to make a comment that really annoyed me. But a shot of Patron remedied that.

Anyways, back to me. The impending exam is less than 2 days away, and well... I'm still at a moderate level of nervousness. I miagined I'll be fine until I drive through the security gates on Loop Rd, at which point I plan to collapse completely! I'm going to really annnoyed if there's nothing I studied on the actual test. And I'm most worried about the psych test. We all know I'm nuts.

And then, if I do pass this exam, comes the board interviews. That will lend itself to more sleepless nights. Just what I need.

Th rest of the world seems to have taken a backseat to all this. Though I'm still being sociable (hockey tonight woohoo!), I seem to always have this on my mind.

Well, thats about all I know to type about, I suppose its time to leave the Sarbucks (i find that my apartment has too many distractions for me to study there) and head home.

I had a good time with G and T last night. They are thinking of moving into my complex. And I'm strongly encouraging that. With the Harem so close, trouble is bound to errupt. Add to that Elise moving in and Jersey already there, AMLI in PTC will be party central! I have a good feeling for the year to come, I haven't been this optimistic in a while.

Friday, January 12, 2007

I eat whe I'm hungry, I drink when I'm thirsty, I shag when I'm horny, I sleep when I'm d

I saw the quote on in a book, and thought it awesome. And except for the shagging part, its pretty much accurate.... If only I could get it at 100%

So much to think about, so much to figure out. Where to start?

I have an appointment for a first step in a job interview process on Thursday morning. There are three real issues I have with this, firstly its in the morning. I don't do mornings well. But I can work around that.

Second, I'm being given a test of some sort, and all I know is plan to be there about 3 hours and bring a calculator. That doesn't make me all warm and fuzzy inside. I had calculus finals that had the same conditions, and that was only for a grade, this is much more life impacting. And with those, I at least had a point to start studying.

And lastly, the more I've thought about it and the more I've discussed it with friends, the more i realize it's a job I really want. Usually I go into job interviews with a sort of whatever attitude. I've had luxury of not needing the job or not being really psyched about getting one. Well, this one is a bit different. For what I do, it's pretty much the holy grail of positions. I mean, for some one who grew up in Atlanta being an airplane lover, Delta is it!

Now, as much as I want the position, theres are lots of factors. I'm prepared to take a pay cut, I can manage that, It'll be a lot less nights out. The big issues is the turmoil in the industry and most of it swirling around Delta. Sooo.. It's going to be a gamble... if I even get throught he examination.

So, been dwelling on that. And studying. And hanging out with the usual suspects. Now, In the unlikely event I do get a position with the big D, let's start the bidding for who wants to be my "companion". Opening bid is to provide me with one home cooked meal a week and an apartment cleaning once a month. :-)

Otherwise, i got the letter from the apartment people about renewing my lease. ANd i'm kinda pissed that they jumped up the rent by $30. Bastards. So, now its over to Elise, my future roommate. Hopefully with her input and her company the rent will be lowered and offset my possible reduction in pay.

Always have a plan. Plus.. i heart Elise!

Thats about it in my world. I'm doing my best to not stress about the Delta stuff, and I've got my suit cleaned and zipper working. That should help after my last interview (if you don't know the story, it's hilarious). I have some other issues I'm wrestling around, but I'm tired of typing.

Y'all wish me luck. In a lot of things.

Monday, January 8, 2007

it's not important

wrote the most defeatest and depressing blog I've ever written. And deleted it shortly afterwords. I seem to have dropped into a crappy modd on a matter of a few hours. I don't know what exactly triggered it, but its not pleasent.

maybe tomorrow will bring better feelings...

Thursday, January 4, 2007

I find sometimes it's easy to be myself, Somtimes i find it's better to be somebody else

So much going on. There's a lot I want to say, but I don't if I want to put it all out there, and I don't know where to start. In the mundane department, I cleaned my place a little, vacuum and dusting, after I defestivized it. I've also obtained a new bed, this one has a better mattress and more importantly, it's a bigger bed. I think it will sleep 2 comfortably and 3 erotically. Now I have to go buy new sheets and bedding paraphanalia.

In the less mundane department, I seem to have lost a CD wallet that holds most of my DMB CD's. Thats a tragedy. I can only think maybe it fell out of the car. I'm sure who ever finds it will be disappointed at the selection inside. On the upside, I do have all the CDs stored digitally, but I suppose I'll embark on buying replacements soon enough. But the loss is saddening.

Next, I ran into A this week. Elise and I took a outing to the Tavern. After deciding we wanted more... culture, we decided to take of to Fados. I like Fados. It's about the only place in Buckhead I enjoy anymore. The big surprise of the night was an appearance by A at Tavern. In true A form, we didn't seem to exist.

However, with Elise's company we persevered and got over it. I'm looking forward to her moving in. I hope that all works out. I feel that it will. I really heart Elise. Think I'll keep her around.

I had my old drum corps jacket putting the latest addition to my pin collection on it. its getting more and more interesting. I suppose I started putting the pins on there when I was marching, my oldest Hard Rock pin is from Boston, along with the Cheers pin. Those go back to 1994. And I just keep adding more on as I go, I have been thinking about doing something else with them. But it gives the old corp jacket even more character than it had to begin with. And I'm affraid that the if they're removed it will fall apart. And its not just hard rock pins, theres lots of interesting ones I've picked up at places around the world... sometimes even wearing the jacket. Lots of memories.

OK, thats about it for the randomness... I need to get to looking busy before management gets in. There's a few other things running around in my mind. Much to figure out... Congrats to number 3000... thanx for reading, makes me feel like people are interested in me!

Tuesday, January 2, 2007

Does anyone really know the words to Auld Lang Sine? Or what is means?

Well, its now 2007 and where did 06 go? It seems to have just flown by. And thats good, I think alot of us are ready to put it behind us. There's always some hope and optimism for the new year, and all we have to do is push ourselves to achieve the goals we've set. Thats not something I'm good at usually.

So we ended up at Underground last night. It's the first time I've been down there in years. And the first time I've been down for New Years. I must say I'm less than impressed and won;t be looking to go back anytime soon. We made the most out the occasion, well... most of us made the most out of the occasion. There was some drama, and it was pointless and just a bit petty. But then again most drama is like that.

But we persevered. And I downed a good bit of vodka. Jersey discovered a new creation, which she has labeled "Pink Satisfaction". It's good stuff. However, I think there's a Man Law against drinking pink drinks, but it's still yummy. If only i could remember how it was made.

Back to the time at underground, there was eating, drinking, and being merry. And dancing, which is always frightening. But it was a good time, and I'm glad I was with the people I was with.

But now lets move forward to 2007. I have a good feeling about the year. Maybe it's unfounedd or just that last year has been trying for so many I know, and in some regards for myself. Today was like a new fresh start. Even the weather seemed to follow. We spent the last hours of 2006 with grey rainy skies and dreay moods, only to awake to find a 2007 starting with beautiful clear skies and sun.

All thats left to do now is rehydrate, get some rest, and make 2007 good. Who wants to come with me?