Listing to Port

For the past few weeks I've been feeling a little like a boat tossed about on a stormy sea.  That feeling seems to have started months ago, prior to my jaunt to the far side of the world.  I guess it started with the self critical rehashing of my last job seeking endeavor.  I didn't feel positive when I left, and thus I felt even less enthused about much else.  It's no secret I'm not the most contented person here in Louisville.  And I really blame myself for that more than anything.

When I came here almost four years ago things looked really rosy.  Major airline, good pay, and a love interest.  The realities of the work environment set in slowly.  I work with some great people, but the corporate attitude leaves something to be desired.  It has to do with my lack of tolerance for disingenuous people.... especially when they are my "superiors". 

The bigger issue though, since work stays at the office when I walk out the door, is the social calendar. The first years I was here I wasn't actually here. My life was still 450 miles away.  The year of having weekends off found me running to the airport on Friday afternoon and jetting south, either Atlanta or Birmingham.  Then I took a weekend midnight shift, which was a dearth to a social calendar. I did however make the acquaintance of a few people outside work, but really who rocks out on a Wednesday night in Louisville?

So, even though my drivers license says I'm a Kentucky resident and my tax returns list this as my primary address, I never fully moved here.  The blessing (or curse) of free flying allowed for the jet setting life.  Now the question comes, do I want to maintain that?  

The last couple weeks I've been halfheartedly looking at potential homes to buy here.  Unfortunately, the housing market hasn't tanked in the way it has in ATL.  And I have high requirements, sort of champagne tastes on a beer budget.  But with some budgeting  I could make it work to have a place here and there.  Though... For how long?  The prospects of satisfactory employment in Atlanta have all but dried up. 

This was on my mind for a good part of my jaunt around Southeast Asia, and since I've been home.  I was thinking of just making Louisville the home, but this past weekend I went back to Atlanta for the first time in 2 months.  And suddenly, the draw has returned stronger than ever.  

I think it comes with the ability to call up some friends on moments notice and suddenly we are gathering somewhere.  Or maybe it's the fun that is a Braves games in the summer, or GT football in the fall (with a sprinkle of some Auburn football). I'm sure once the Lewii and TanJoe return the attraction will grow in intensity. Even though they're settled into the old, married people routines. :-P

There's the attraction of close by family, even though of late that's been the cause of more stress than help.  Nothing terrible, just years of avoiding certain truths that are no longer ignorable. I am lucky though, everyone worries about how I feel.  I feel fine.

This weekend found me at Turner field with Jersey, both of us resplendent in our new Braves jerseys, numerous visits to Taco Mac with Jersey, Charity, Genna, Erika, and Ed at various different times, lunch with a gleeful Maggie (more on that later), and the most surprising meet up with some one from way back when.  You know, back in the day when I went to Sunday school.  I guess I haven't seen Ginger since I graduated high school.  And through the miracle of Facebook, we ended up meeting for food, drinks, and drag queens.  And it was a blast.

Now, lunch with Maggie and Jack (who turned 1 year old today!!) was inspiring.  Jack is looking great, and given his less than ideal start at life, is a modern miracle of pediatric cardiology.  After lunch at Thai Spice (Maggie's choice...  I assured her after a month in Asia I could handle more Thai food because it's amazing), we did some shopping. Since momma needed to find clothes, I was babysitter.  Of course, all the ladies there commented how adorable Jack was and asked me all about him, and of course I just shrugged my shoulders. "How old is he?" *shrug*. " He looks like he's got some sun already, where?" *shrug*. I'm sure the random strangers believe me to be the worst father ever.  Luckily, I'm not the father...  Not that I'm opposed (totally) to kids, or that Maggie wouldn't be a fine wife...  But I'm just not a big enough douchebag to compare to the real father. But at any rate, the reactions were fun. 

And while at lunch, Maggie proposed an idea I find intriguing, and slightly frightening.  After some further research and encouragement, I'm seriously contemplating her proposal. Look for details soon.  It should be fun, and potentially lucrative.  But I mostly think it'll be fun.  

Now it's back to the grind.  Today is laundry day.  With the exception of a load I flew with me to Atlanta (and thanx big time to Jersey for not only for the bed to sleep but use of the laundry facilities) I have about 2 months worth of clothes to wash.  My apartment is a disaster area, and laundry is the first step.  Returning home to a non functional dryer allowed for the laundry pile to reach Himilayan heights.  And now, there's a leaky kitchen sink to deal with.  Well mostly for the landlords to deal with.  But the mess of wet cardboard under the sink was mine to handle.  I'm also getting back on the diet.  While still way to the good side, I'm putting on weight.  And I don't like it.  The new schedule, as much as I hate midnights all the time, will help with it's consistancy.  If only I can get my sleeping  pattern down.

I suppose I shuld get back to the laundry, since apparently it won't put itself away...  I know I tried to wait it out. I have a list of other things I need to do...  Starting with learning to be a better proofreader.